Step by Step Anger Management for Mothers

Happy Moms is pleased to introduce Anger management activity for mothers.  Anger is a strong  negative feeling which you transfer to others or your  kids. Its important to manage it before its too late. Here are some details to help you

Steps to follow
Self Healing
Tips to manage your anger

Steps to follow:

Step 1 is  realizing that you need anger management. 

Step 2 is  recording in Anger Log that includes filling this form everyday for  a week to record wat triggers your anger, how  you react and on whom  you   got angry. Fill the form here, and press submit.  (Fill the form for 7  days to know your  triggers)

Thank you for coming this way and surely you will be able to overcome your anger after this activity!

If you want to take a look on how you can effectively manage your anger check our recent article and videos here

Join our facebook group to be a part of this activity:

Happy Moms Facebook Group for Mothers

Happy Mom you have got it!

Self Healing

“Story of a Wounded Mother”

There was a mother wolf and a baby wolf, they got wounded due to sudden land sliding under the mountains where they use to live. The mother wolf kept licking her cubs wound and keep protecting him from the cold. But because she herself was badly wounded too, she was unable to bring good food. she tried putting up some leaves on the wound of her cub, put some water but the cub kept on crying. So her friend squirrel asked her to take the cub to the Owl, who might help.

When the mother visited the owl, he after analyzing the situation and the wound asked the mother, “why didn’t you do something for your own wound?”

The mother wolf replied; “because i don’t feel anything on my wound, my child is in much pain and i want his wound to heal first”

The owl replied; “But you failed to understand that as u were also hurt u were unable to take care of your child perfectly, because u r hurt u couldn’t get good food, because u r wounded and u licked his wound and instead of healing it u r making it worst. The wound would have

healed on its own if u cud have just given some good food and care, your child has the ability to heal only with some good conditions “

What do you think is happening here? We all are also like a wounded mother wolf, where we don’t realize that SELF CARE and SELF HEALING is the first step towards a good parenting. If you are at your best, if u are healed, you will be able to give the best to your child!

We do read a lot of articles about parenting, good parenting, positive parenting, disciplined parenting. but we do not get 100% successful…why? because we are missing an important part of healing ourselves first, being the best of yourself and only then you will b able to help your child and only then you will be able to follow the best parenting practices!

I hope with this anger management activity and few more activities to come we will b able to find our true and best self!

Lets realize first that we need to gather ourselves, and forget about changing others and their behavior, lets focus on our self!

Tips to manage your anger

Tip # 1: Leave the situation

Self healing is the first step to build a connection with your child, so we are starting some tips and tricks to self heal in order to manage your anger. You need to do this first

1. Look at the pattern of the events you felt anger at (as you recorded for a week)
2. List down the things that are your triggers, kids making mess or you r tired, or the rushing situation, whatever makes you angry list them down separately from your record
3. Now look at the reactions you have given to all those situations and write down what you could have done instead? Ask yourself what is the better way to deal this situation think as an outsider-third person in the situation, list down the better reactions.
4. Practicing them one by one

Here is the first step:
Just when you feel triggered. Leave the situation, leave the room, go to another room or kitchen or somewhere you r alone. Give yourself good 10 to 15 mins to calm down, analyze what you can do, how you can react better or deal with the situation calmly and then go back and act.

Here is the sunnah way, Sit if you r standing, lay down if you r sitting or stand up. Do wazu (ablution). Most importantly anger is one of the weapon of shaitan to make our brain useless at that moment so recite “Laholawala quata…” when you get yourself out of the situation and calm down

Practice this one today and let us knw in comments how it goes!

Tip # 2 Mindfulness

Being conscious: that means that u remain conscious about reacting badly when angry – Shouting, hitting and spanking the child. When you are conscious about it and think before your react you will b able to control it.

For example: you want to offer prayer and the little one is continuously nagging and crying “that ree ree ree” because they want to watch their favorite cartoons and you are firm on the decision to not give any extra screen time, irritation is building up and you are sure you are going to loose it but u don’t loose it…why? because you are conscious and you are thinking I don’t have to be angry let me see how can I react better, “cheekna nhi hai…bacha hai let me handle it calmly mene gussa nhi krna”. This is mindfulness, you are conscious about your reaction, so you calm down…but how?

Try tip no 1 of leaving the situation for a while. If u can’t then do it there and then.

Take three deep breaths…remind yourself you are in control of the situation and you have to react positively.

Deep breaths; say 1…inhale, hold for 2,3,4 and exhale long 55555….repeat three times. and then think fast what do they need or just take them in your lap hug them, talk about their toys or something more interesting while they forget about what they were whining about. ( You can teach inhale and exhale activity to your kids too, you all can try 2gther to calm down)

Once they are calm down give them something to get busy, pat yourself, you did it, you didn’t loose your cool and offer prayer peacefully.